The DLF just emailed out this statement and, having had only a quick read through it, I find it immensely worrying that the organisation would still consider Vavi any kind of leader after his behaviour. He abused his power to hire a woman, possibly only with the intention of having sexual relations with her. This… Read More ›
Following the Vavi rape accusation South Africans have questioned the validity of claims of rape where the victim or survivor has not opened a case with the police. This, despite the fact that it is well-documented that rape is vastly under-reported. When confronted with this evidence, many South Africans respond that it is the duty of the rape survivor to report to the police, to take the matter to court and, once there, find justice.
I was 7 years old.
I did report my rape but I wish I hadn’t.
I have never told a soul, except for my GP who I saw the next day for HIV tests etc
Struck a cord. Difference is I did report. I walked into the police station after being beaten blue, nose swollen, blood all over my shirt from my nose, shorts in tatters from being ripped with a knife, one eye blue and swollen closed. And I was victimised by the police.
I never reported my rape. First of all because I could not recollect everything that had happened, even though I do remember the crucial parts.
The alcohol and the exhaustion from the continuing chronic insomnia finally caught up to me, and I had to find a corner and sit on my hands to stop myself from glassing my rapist.
I had incredibly low self esteem as a child and teenager, my family had moved around a lot and I always felt like an outsider. I had had one very brief, naive relationship, and wasn’t really sure how to go about dating, but I was very lonely, and desperate for someone to take an interest in me in the hopes it would somehow validate my existence. A 19 year old who worked as a waiter where I also worked seemed to take an interest in me.
That’s the last bit I remember. A few hours later I woke up in his arms. He was asleep. I was fully dressed, thank God. However, I kept wondering what he had been doing to me while I was asleep. I wanted to throw up. I really hated the guy, and no matter how drunk, I could not imagine getting in this situation willingly.
I knew I would be judged, I knew I would be blamed, I knew I would be ridiculed and called a liar and I never would have spoken out had it not been for my suicide attempt.
I was a 21 year old student when I was raped. A guy I had known for a few months, spent a lot of time with violated me. He wanted us to see each other on a more bf/gf sense but I wasn’t interested in him. Nonetheless we continued the friendship my friends I knew… Read More ›
Note: Less than a day after news was broken of an allegation of rape against Cosatu general secretary Zwelinzima Vavi and vicious rape myths are already circulating in public discourse. These myths hurt all rape survivors. The most common myth I have picked up so far is that fallacy that, because Vavi’s accuser has not opened a police case, she must be lying. I put out a call on Twitter for survivors who didn’t report to send me their story. I will be publishing them as they come in.